I don't know exactly what to say in this post other than mom has been on a downward spiral the past few weeks. She fell at the nursing home again on March 12th and broke her shoulder and her hip. The ER doctor didn't see it and sent her BACK to the nursing home. The next morning Cheryl had the head of the radiology dept read the films and confirmed the 2 breaks. The nursing home staff proceeded to make her as comfortable as possible but she just went downhill very fast.

Her bp fell dangerously low so they called 911 I think on March 24th. She was admitted to the hospital where she needed 2 units of blood, fluids because she was dehydrated, needed blood, UTI, thyroid out of wack etc. The doctors discussed Hospice with us at that time as well, due to her leukemia being out of remission, therefore we contacted Hospice and they have put her under their care as of March 28th.

She returned to the nursing home on Saturday, weak, going in and out of sleep and we thought we would be planning her funeral for this week. However on Sunday, she was gotten up out of bed twice for 2 meals and was awake and alert.

She never ceases to amaze us. So who knows what will happen....I certainly cannot predict a thing anymore...

New Update On Mom

We fear mom to have had another stroke. Not sure when, but in the past 2 weeks. We can always tell because of her skin tone and her pupils are always blown. Of which they were today. I didn't go over but Cathy went this afternoon and then Cheryl went tonight.

While Cathy visited they had to change her ilestomy seal twice because they are no longer staying on properly. I'm not sure what is going on with that other than I believe her skin to be breaking down. If that happens, I don't know what they will do for her.

She's also had a sore on her ankle for a year now that has never quite healed, but no one seemed concerned about it as far as the medical staff. Well, according to Cheryl it looked worse tonight, and the nurse was in the room attending to something else and whispered to Cheryl that mom has MERSA. And didn't anyone call to tell us???

No. No one has called to inform us of this. You know...I have so much I want to say about the care of the elderly but I just don't have the energy at the moment to do it.

All I can say is I feel like going to a lawyer and drawing up a paper that states IF I get dementia in my old age, that I want to have assisted suicide. I DO NOT want to live like my mama and I don't want my children to have to deal with all this either. It's just not fair.

God??? WHAT is your purpose in all this? PLEASE reveal it to me. She is suffering...my sisters and I are suffering...and...I've had about all I can take. God forgive me for saying that..but it's the truth...

and I'll be indebted to grief for the rest of my life the day she passes on and I recall this post...I just can't win.